today marks our third paper - cs! haha, tml is dear's last paper. can you feel the excitement already? haha. was way better than i thought it would be, given that cs is simply a subject which you read and nothing goes in. maybe, i really wasted the s/u option.
my dad sent me to school today, went to malaysia to pump petrol, then jp to hang around. only realised it afterwards, cos i presumed when he said he could, it didnt mean waiting around, doing nothing. it's almost as if, when i have exams, he does too. quite touched actually, but i guess the nice effective communication i have with dear jus doesnt work with parents. its the 19 years of barrier i guess.
had exams at the sports and recreation centre, a venue where we had two of our exams for last sem. quite a nice de javu feeling outside actually, like its amazing how the last time i was at this place, dear's not my dear. furthermore, we were completely unlike a couple today just like normal friends waiting for the exam to start, and then saying bye, parting ways after the exam. just made the de ja vu feeling even stronger. haha. and i still remember the time we finished our last paper, i was feeling rather sian. i even constantly turned behind to see if i could see you guys catching up or something. cos, normally, after our papers, both our cliques will gather outside the exam hall, and chat a little about the exams. but not for our last paper! jenard didn't wait for you guys, and i couldnt possibly have said, eh wait for a while more, cos i want to see you. haha. so it was a little depressing since that was the last day of school, and i didn't get to see you for one last time. lol. and then there was a glimmer of hope that i could bump into you at the 179 bus stop, but jenard had to go to the toilet. i was thinking ahh shucks damn... haha.
went to eat swensens with guoyong together, turned out fine. didnt have the agony of a shiny lightbulb like the other time when guoyong stayed with us for the afternoon. i guess it's cos we were still going to spend time after that, and probably the compassionate stage has now allowed the presence of other people.
bio today was disappointing if i must say, i guess we are really too tired to feel anything huh.
the feelings sucks! haha, as in, we only have this little chances to study bio and we should maximise the time we spend. but we never seem to be able to get it right.. haha.
you tried studying cs while i kept distracting you with hotel city. sorry man, not in the right mood to study. haha, so end up, i was the one distracting you, not the other way round, unlike your initial fears. so... i guess studying at my house is not a solution after all. perhaps, felicia with her cryings every hour might even be a better environment! well, not as if we have alot of chances to study together anw.
a little unhappiness after the paper, and i know you realised. trivial matter, wasn't even supposed to feel unhappy over it. haha, but im fine now, or rather i was fine a few hours ago. haha. and dear, when i say im fine, i really forgive and forget. hahaha.
been a long and tiring day. i swear im going to sleep early tonight.
found this blog, read it and re-lived tons of feelings.
the language, feelings, pessimism and emo-ness is crazy man.
perhaps, its time to put in some happiness in this blog.
and really, the real reason i'm continuing this blog, is so that my beloved someone will be able to read it. i guess its really unfair that i get to read his, and he doesnt get to read mine. haha. soo.. here it is. but no assurance on how long it will last, since i will really be typing double entries since i have no intention to abandon my diary. (THAT DIARY IS EXPENSIVE OKAY. CANNOT WASTE) haha, or maybe triple entries even.. hahaha.
anyway, some updates of my life. i'm in psychology now, ntu. managed to get into the course i wanted to since secondary sch.. no surprise there though. life's cool. and although i went into uni with no expectations of making any long-lasting friendships, i met someone.
this relationship is filled with many first times, times and feelings that i never thought i will be lucky enough to feel. sometimes i wonder if he feels this way too, since he have had another true blue relationship before me. and sometimes, i can't help but compare. was he happier then or now? haha.
but anyway, its a short post. so in summary, he's the first guy i love. <3
please wait patiently for the next one! =)
the whispers
Zijun
17.12.90
the whispered
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